21 May 2011

The Big Bang Theory (Season 04) Quotes


Title: The Big Bang Theory



Season 04

Amy Fowler: How about you, Penny? Do you go on many dates?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Uh, yeah, I wouldn't say many. A few... What's ha-ha?
Sheldon Cooper: Your characterization of approximately 171 different men as a few.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: What? Where did you get 171 men?
Sheldon Cooper: Simple extrapolation. In the three years that I've known you, you were single for two. During that time, I saw seventeen different suitors. If we work backwards, correcting for observation bias and postulate an initial dating age of fifteen...
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Whoa, wait, wait, wait. I did not start dating at fifteen.
Sheldon Cooper: I'm sorry. Sixteen?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Fourteen.
Sheldon Cooper: My mistake. Now, assuming the left side of a bell curve peaking around the present, that would bring the total up to 193 men. Plus or minus eight men.
Amy Fowler: Remarkable. Did you have sexual intercourse with all of these men?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: No.
Sheldon Cooper: Although that number would be fairly easy to calculate.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh.
Sheldon Cooper: Based on the number of awkward encounters I've had with strange men leaving her apartment in the morning, plus the number of times she's returned home wearing the same clothes she wore the night before...
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Okay, Sheldon, I think you've made your point.
Sheldon Cooper: So we multiply 193, minus 21 men before the loss of virginity, so 172 times 0.18 gives us 30.96 sexual partners. Let's round that up to 31.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Okay, Sheldon, you are so wrong. That is not even close to the real number. I’m gonna need a drink over here.
Amy Fowler: This is very interesting. Cultural perceptions are subjective. Penny, to your mind, are you a slut?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: No! No! No...
-- S04E01 The Robotic Manipulation

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Hi, I'm Penny. I'll be your waitress.
Leonard Hofstadter: Why are you introducing yourself?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: I'd rather people not know I have any prior connection to you whatsoever.
-- S04E02 The Cruciferous Vegetable Amplification

Mary Cooper: Sheldon, sit down. Let's talk.
Sheldon Cooper: All right, but you’re not fooling me. Whenever you say we have to talk, it means you want me to listen.
Mary Cooper: Then stop talking.
Sheldon Cooper: Yes, ma'am.
-- S04E03 The Zazzy Substitution

Mary Cooper: He thinks he's such a smarty pants. He's no different from any man. You tell them not to do something, that's all they want to do...
-- S04E03 The Zazzy Substitution

Amy Fowler: I understand that some people find mates in social gathering places such as bars or taverns. Have you tried a bar or tavern?
Leonard Hofstadter: No, I'm not gonna try to pick up a woman in a bar.
Sheldon Cooper: Wise decision. You see, Amy, success at a bar is based on classic male attributes such as height, strength, attractiveness, the ability to hold one's liquor and throw darts, separately or together. Leonard has none of these attributes, right, Leonard?
Leonard Hofstadter: Right.
Amy Fowler: That's not true of all bars. Juice bars, for example.
Sheldon Cooper: Oh! Good point, Amy. Yeah, building on your premise, Leonard could frequent sushi bars, salad bars, oyster bars, the Apple Genius Bar...
-- S04E05 The Desperation Emanation

Leonard Hofstadter: No, seriously, I think I've finally figured out my problem with women.
Sheldon Cooper: The capybara is the largest member of the rodent family.
Leonard Hofstadter: What does that have to do with me and women?
Sheldon Cooper: Nothing. It was a desperate attempt to introduce an alternate topic of conversation.
-- S04E07 The Apology Insufficiency

Sheldon Cooper: You know, I try very hard to make our lunch hours educational and informative, but your insistence on talking about your own lives stymies me at every turn.
-- S04E07 The Apology Insufficiency

Leonard Hofstadter: Want to get that?
Sheldon Cooper: Not particularly.
Leonard Hofstadter: Could you get that?
Sheldon Cooper: I suppose I could if I were asked.
Leonard Hofstadter: Would you please get that?
Sheldon Cooper: Of course. Why do you have to make things so complicated?
-- S04E07 The Apology Insufficiency

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: You know, sometimes stuff just happens, and there's nothing you can do about it. For example, Lisa Peterson hasn't talked to me since the 11th grade because no matter how much you apologize, you can't go back and un-dry hump someone's boyfriend.
-- S04E07 The Apology Insufficiency

Sheldon Cooper: Under normal circumstances I'd say, 'I told you so' but as I have told you so with such vehemence and frequency already, the phrase has lost all meaning. Therefore, I will be replacing it with the phrase, 'I informed you thusly'.
-- S04E08 The 21-Second Excitation

Bernadette Rostenkowski: Okay, my turn. Penny, truth or dare?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Truth.
Bernadette Rostenkowski: Why are you still hanging out with Leonard so much even though you broke up with him?
Amy Fowler: Oh, that's an excellent question. For two people who claim to be no longer pair-bonded, you spend an inordinate amount of time in each other's company.
Bernadette Rostenkowski: Yeah.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Dare.
Amy Fowler: I don't believe the rules allow for an ex post facto option change.
Bernadette Rostenkowski: Yeah.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Okay, look, just because we're not seeing each other anymore doesn't mean we can't be friends. I mean, Leonard's a great guy.
Amy Fowler: Then, why did you terminate your relationship with him?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: I don't know. He got really serious, and I wasn't ready for it.
Amy Fowler: Interesting. How will you react if, in the future, you become ready for it, and Leonard is unavailable, because another woman has realized that he is, to use your words, a great guy?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: You can only ask one question.
Amy Fowler: That one.
Bernadette Rostenkowski: That one.
-- S04E08 The 21-Second Excitation

Leonard Hofstadter: You'll never guess what just happened.
Sheldon Cooper: You went out in the hallway, stumbled into an inter-dimensional portal which brought you 5,000 years into the future where you took advantage of the advanced technology to build a time machine, and now you're back to bring us all with you to the year 7010 where we are transported to work at the thinkatorium by telepathically controlled flying dolphins?
Leonard Hofstadter: No.
Sheldon Cooper: Aw.
Leonard Hofstadter: Penny kissed me.
Sheldon Cooper: Well, who would ever guess that?
-- S04E09 The Boyfriend Complexity

Sheldon Cooper: Einstein defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results...
-- S04E09 The Boyfriend Complexity

Leonard Hofstadter: Why do I bother talking to you people?
Sheldon Cooper: If it'll make you feel better, we rarely listen.
-- S04E09 The Boyfriend Complexity

Sheldon Cooper: Leonard, Penny, excellent. I'd like to say I'm very happy that you're back together, and if I can figure out a way to do so and sound sincere, I will...
-- S04E09 The Boyfriend Complexity

Bernadette Rostenkowski: He's really cute. How do you know him?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, we went out a couple of times.
Amy Fowler: I'm often flummoxed by current slang. Does 'went out' mean 'had intercourse'?
Bernadette Rostenkowski: Yes.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: No, no. But in this case, yes.
-- S04E10 The Alien Parasite Hypothesis

Sheldon Cooper: Well, you're the expert. If the correct way to do it is the wrong way, then I yield.
-- S04E10 The Alien Parasite Hypothesis

Sheldon Cooper: I won't say that all senior citizens who can't master technology should be publicly flogged, but if we made an example of one or two, it might give the others incentive to try harder.
-- S04E12 The Bus Pants Utilization

Leonard Hofstadter: Okay, that’s it. You're fired.
Sheldon Cooper: Really? Why?
Leonard Hofstadter: Because you're impossible to work with.
-- S04E12 The Bus Pants Utilization

Penny: You know, for a smart guy, you really seem to have a hard time grasping the concept 'don't piss off the people who handle the things you eat'.
Amy: That does seem to be a valid principle.
Sheldon: I trust Penny will adhere to the Official California Restaurant Workers' Solemn Oath of Ethics and Cleanliness.
Amy: I don't believe there's any such thing.
Sheldon: You lied to me?
-- S04E13 The Love Car Displacement

Amy Fowler: All right. Have you considered improving your socialization skills, thus allowing you to communicate more effectively with other people?
Sheldon Cooper: Isn't that their burden? I'm the one with something interesting to say.
Amy Fowler: Fair enough, but in its essence, teaching is a performance art. In the classroom paradigm, the teacher has the responsibility to communicate, as well as entertain and engage.
-- S04E14 The Thespian Catalyst

Sheldon Cooper: Oh, I'm sorry. I thought making the transition from actor to acting teacher was the signal that one's career had reached the end of the road.
-- S04E14 The Thespian Catalyst

Sheldon Cooper: I must confess I don't understand you, President Siebert. First, you say you want me to appear at your fundraisers, but now you say you never want me to go anywhere near your fundraisers. Forgive me, but that sounds like a mixed message. Here we go again. If there's simply no talking to me, why did you call? I'm sorry, someone's on the other line. Why don't you see if you can organize your thoughts, and we'll try again later...
-- S04E15 The Benefactor Factor

Sheldon Cooper: Penny, you're an expert on trading sexual favors for material gain. Walk him through this.
...
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: What was all that about me trading sexual favors for material gain?
Sheldon Cooper: It was a compliment. I believe in giving credit where credit is due.
-- S04E15 The Benefactor Factor

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Good morning, slut.
Leonard Hofstadter: What?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, please, I recognize the walk of shame when I see it. All you're missing is a little smeared mascara and a purse with panties wadded up in it.
Sheldon Cooper: What's going on?
Leonard Hofstadter: Oh, nothing's going on. Excuse me.
Sheldon Cooper: Are you just getting home?
Leonard Hofstadter: Yeah.
Sheldon Cooper: That's a good sign, right?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, yeah.
Sheldon Cooper: I'm so proud of you! You sold yourself out like a common streetwalker!
Leonard Hofstadter: No, I didn't do it for the money.
Sheldon Cooper: She stiffed you?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: I believe that's what your roommate did to her.
Sheldon Cooper: What?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Again, read the book we gave you.
Leonard Hofstadter: No, I mean, I, I, I got the money first.
Sheldon Cooper: Smart, get paid up front. Yeah, I think you have a real knack for gigolo work, Leonard.
Leonard Hofstadter: Uh, I'm gonna go lie down.
Sheldon Cooper: That's a good idea. Get your rest. There are a lot more rich old ladies out there, and Daddy needs a new linear accelerator. And I thought he didn't learn anything from his relationship with you.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Hey!
Sheldon Cooper: Another compliment! Learn to recognize them.
-- S04E15 The Benefactor Factor

Sheldon Cooper: Leonard, social protocol states when a friend is upset, you offer them a hot beverage, such as tea.
-- S04E16 The Cohabitation Formulation

Priya Koothrappali: Listen, Rajesh, Leonard and I have decided to see each other again, and you don't get to tell me who I can and can't have a relationship with.
Sheldon Cooper: Actually, he can. The Hindu Code of Manu is very clear in these matters. If a woman's father is not around, the duty of controlling her base desires falls to the closest male member of her family, in this case, Raj. The code also states that if she disobeys, she will be reborn in the womb of a jackal and tormented by diseases. If true, that seems like an awfully large gamble given that the prize is Leonard.
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: There it is, Priya. We're Indian. We believe this stuff.
Priya Koothrappali: I think it also says that if you eat beef, you need to live with cows for three months and drink their urine.
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: Some of it makes sense, some of it's crazy. My point is, you can't go out with Leonard.
-- S04E16 The Cohabitation Formulation

Leonard Hofstadter: Penny, this is Raj's sister, Priya.
Priya Koothrappali: It's very nice to meet you.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, yeah, you, too.
Sheldon Cooper: Priya, if you're experiencing any tension or awkwardness, it may stem from the fact that Leonard and Penny used to, if I may quote Howard, 'do the dance with no pants'.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Sheldon!
Leonard Hofstadter: Really?
-- S04E16 The Cohabitation Formulation

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, yes. Hi, hi. I'm sorry. I didn't know you had company. I don't want to impose.
Sheldon Copper: No, no. It's not an imposition. At this point, in our ecosystem, you are akin to the plover, a small scavenging bird that eats extra food from between the teeth of crocodiles. Please, fly into our open maw, and have at it.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: If I had more than a box of baking soda in my refrigerator, I wouldn't have to take that.
-- S04E16 The Cohabitation Formulation

Priya Koothrappali: So, Penny. Leonard tells me you're an actress. That must be pretty exciting.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, yeah, yeah. It's really great. Today I drove to Van Nuys for an audition I thought was going to be for a cat food commercial. (It) turned out to be porn.
Sheldon Cooper: Did you get the part?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: I didn't do the audition.
Sheldon Cooper: Given the state of your career, can you really afford to be picky?
-- S04E16 The Cohabitation Formulation

Sheldon Cooper: Buona sera, Luigi's Pizza. Buona sera, it means 'good evening' in Italian. May I say, having to explain that to you calls into question the authenticity of your ristorante?
Leonard Hofstadter: Okay, I'm out of here.
Sheldon Cooper: Un momento. Oh, for heaven's sake, now you’re being deliberately stupid...
-- S04E17 The Toast Derivation

Sheldon Cooper: Well, I don't want to go to a party.
Leonard Hofstadter: It's not a party. It's the same group of people who hang out here, hanging out over there.
Sheldon Cooper: I'm sorry, but five people eating and chatting is a party.
Leonard Hofstadter: How come it's not a party when we do it here?
Sheldon Cooper: Because we don't throw parties.
-- S04E17 The Toast Derivation

Sheldon Cooper: The audible sigh is a show of exasperation, right?
-- S04E17 The Toast Derivation

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Look, Sheldon, Leonard is dating Priya. She is staying with Raj; that means you're all probably gonna be hanging out there more.
...
Amy Fowler: Sheldon, look at me. I think it's time to face the fact that Leonard is the nucleus of your social group. Where he goes, the group goes.
Sheldon Cooper: Leonard the nucleus? That makes no sense. I'm the whimsical elf that everyone looks to for a good time.
-- S04E17 The Toast Derivation

Zack Johnson: Anyway, after we get done snowboarding, I go back to the lodge and get in the Jacuzzi. There's no one around, so naturally, I'm free-balling it. Next thing I know, this beautiful chick shows up, drunk out of her skull, and wants to get in with me.
Sheldon Cooper: Question. Was it a Jacuzzi or a hot tub?
Barry Kripke: Weally? That’s your question?
Zack Johnson: What's the difference?
Sheldon Cooper: Jacuzzi is a commercial brand, hot tub is the generic term, i.e. all Jacuzzis are hot tubs, but not all hot tubs are Jacuzzis.
Zack Johnson: Is that like all thumbs are fingers, but not all fingers are thumbs?
Sheldon Cooper: Surprisingly, yes.
Zack Johnson: Nice. Now, what exactly are toes?
-- S04E17 The Toast Derivation

Stuart Bloom: Can you please get back to the drunk girl? I'd like something to think about in the shower.
Zack Johnson: Oh, yeah. Right. Anyway, she takes off all of her clothes, climbs into the hot tub, and the first thing I notice...
Sheldon Cooper: The water level rose.
Zack Johnson: No.
Sheldon Cooper: Of course it did. It's said that Archimedes, the ancient Greek mathematician, discovered the principle of displacement while taking a bath.
Barry Kripke: Tewwific. Go ahead, Zack. Naked dwunk girl, fwee-balling, continue.
-- S04E17 The Toast Derivation

Priya Koothrappali: It's a little weird, your ex-girlfriend hanging out here all the time.
Leonard Hofstadter: I know. I usually never see my ex-girlfriends, unless their hard drives crash.
Priya Koothrappali: I'm just saying, how would you feel if I was hanging out with my ex-boyfriend?
Leonard Hofstadter: Um, not great, I guess. But Penny and I are just friends.
Priya Koothrappali: I don't care. This is a woman you have slept with. If you want her around, then I have to wonder if maybe you're not ready to move on.
-- S04E18 The Prestidigitation Approximation

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Hey, I think I know how you did the card trick.
Sheldon Cooper: Oh, oh, please. If I don't know, you don’t know. That's axiomatic.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Come here...
Howard Wolowitz: You're right.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Not too bad for someone who doesn't know what axiomatic means.
-- S04E18 The Prestidigitation Approximation

Leonard Hofstadter: Uh, I kind of have a problem I was hoping you could help me with.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Sure, anything.
Leonard Hofstadter: Move out.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: What?
Leonard Hofstadter: Well, uh, not far. Hey, if you ever wanna start a family, La Cañada has some great schools.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Okay, I'm not moving anywhere. What the hell is this all about?
Leonard Hofstadter: Why does it have to be about anything? Can't a fella ask his buddy to relocate, no questions asked?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, for god's sake, Leonard. This is about Priya, isn't it? She doesn't want me hanging out with you.
Leonard Hofstadter: Yes. There, I said it.
-- S04E18 The Prestidigitation Approximation

?: Mr. Cooper, there's nothing...
Sheldon: Dr. Cooper.
?: Seriously?
Leonard Hofstadter: Not the kind with access to drugs.
-- S04E19 The Zarnecki Incursion

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Hey.
Leonard Hofstadter: Hey, Penny. We're kind of in the middle of a crisis here.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, I know. Bernadette told me. Sorry, Sheldon. I know that game meant a lot to you.
Sheldon Cooper: That game? Excuse me, Penny, but Doodle Jump is a game. Angry Birds is a game. World of Warcraft is a massively multi-player online role-playing... all right, technically it's a game.
-- S04E19 The Zarnecki Incursion

Priya Koothrappali: Oh! Hello.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, hi! I was just dropping off a cheesecake to Sheldon. He was robbed of a bunch of imaginary crap that's useful in a make-believe place.
Priya Koothrappali: I don't know what that means.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Yeah, well, sadly, I do.
-- S04E19 The Zarnecki Incursion

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Did you know that last weekend Priya took Leonard rollerblading at the beach? Can you believe that?
Bernadette Rostenkowski: I feel like I'm supposed to say 'that bitch!', but I don't have enough information.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: I'm the one who spent two years trying to get him to even go to the beach in the first place. And he was so phobic about stepping on medical waste I'd carry him to the water.
Bernadette Rostenkowski: I took Howard to the beach once. He almost burst into flames like a vampire.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: So what's the thanks I get for turning Leonard into quality boyfriend material? I have to tiptoe around his new girlfriend!
Amy Fowler: I think you're on.
Bernadette Rostenkowski: Oh. That bitch!
-- S04E19 The Zarnecki Incursion

Leonard Hofstadter: Oh, wait. Hang on. Are you upset?
Priya Koothrappali: No, no, I think it's sexy to date a boy trapped in a man's body.
Leonard Hofstadter: Good, good. I'll tell you what happens.
Sheldon Cooper: And people think I don't get sarcasm.
-- S04E19 The Zarnecki Incursion

Leonard Hofstadter: Something's wrong, I’m not getting any gas. Anybody know anything about internal combustion engines?
Sheldon Cooper: Of course.
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: Very basic.
Howard Wolowitz: 19th-century technology.
Leonard Hofstadter: Does anybody know how to fix an internal combustion engine?
Sheldon Cooper: No.
Howard Wolowitz: No, not a clue.
Leonard Hofstadter: Well, we'd better call somebody to come pick us up.
-- S04E19 The Zarnecki Incursion

Amy Fowler: Now, now. Evolutionary biologist Robin Dunbar has identified gossip as an aid to social bonding in large groups.
-- S04E20 The Herb Garden Germination

Sheldon Cooper: If you don't mind, I'd like to stop listening to you, and start talking.
Amy Fowler: By all means.
-- S04E20 The Herb Garden Germination

Amy Fowler: Meme theory suggests that items of gossip are like living things that seek to reproduce using humans as their host.
...
Sheldon Cooper: Your meme hypothesis does intrigue me. How might we examine this more closely?
Amy Fowler: Do you have any ethical qualms regarding human experimentation?
Sheldon Cooper: It's one of the few forms of interaction with people that I don't find repellent.
Amy Fowler: We need to fabricate a tantalizing piece of gossip.
Sheldon Cooper: And a second non-tantalizing piece to use as a control.
Amy Fowler: Then we'll track its progress through our social group, and interpret the results through the competing academic prisms of memetic theory, algebraic gossip and epidemiology.
Sheldon Cooper: Look at you, getting me to engage in the social sciences. You're a vixen, Amy Farrah Fowler.
-- S04E20 The Herb Garden Germination

Leonard Hofstadter: (I) hope you're hungry.
Sheldon Cooper: Interesting. A friendly sentiment in this country, cruel taunt in the Sudan. It's a lesson in context.
-- S04E20 The Herb Garden Germination

Priya Koothrappali: My point is, Sheldon, the legal principle is ambiguity in a contract benefits the party that did not draft it, in this case, Leonard...
Sheldon Cooper: But...
Priya Koothrappali: There's no buts, Sheldon. That's how the law works.
-- S04E21 The Agreement Dissection

Leonard Hofstadter: I got you the lamb kabob.
Sheldon Cooper: Thank you. If you think about it, Greek food isn't that far from Italian food. They share a spice palette. And what a civilization is the Greeks. They gave us science, democracy, and little cubes of charred meat that taste like sweat.
-- S04E21 The Agreement Dissection

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Did you take dance lessons?
Sheldon Cooper: Against my will. In the South, pre-adolescent children are forced through a process called cotillion, which indoctrinates them with all the social graces and dance skills needed to function in 18th century Vienna.
-- S04E21 The Agreement Dissection

Amy Fowler: Okay. (I) don't really know where we go from here.
Sheldon Cooper: I suggest we treat our relationship as if it were a crashed computer, and restore it to the last point we both agree it worked.
-- S04E21 The Agreement Dissection

Amy Fowler: Priya just made a snide comment about your acting career.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: What the hell did she say?
Amy Fowler: She thinks it's cool you're following your dream no matter what.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: That bitch!
-- S04E22 The Wildebeest Implementation

Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: I was just feeling blue.
Sheldon Cooper: Blue, as in depressed.
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: Well, not so much depressed as lonely.
Sheldon Cooper: I don't know what color lonely is.
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: What?
Sheldon Cooper: Red is angry, yellow is frightened, green is jealous and blue is depressed. Perhaps we can assign a color to lonely.
-- S04E22 The Wildebeest Implementation

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, don't tell me you're afraid of germs.
Sheldon Cooper: Not all germs, just the ones that will kill me. It's the same way I'm not afraid of all steak knives, just the ones that might be plunged in my thorax.
Leonard Hofstadter: Right, fine. I'll tell Howard you didn't come because you're more concerned about your own well-being than his.
Sheldon Cooper: I would think he would know that.
-- S04E23 The Engagement Reaction

Bernadette Rostenkowski: You told her we were going to get married, and she had a heart attack?
Howard Wolowitz: You can't take that personally.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: How else is she supposed to take it?
-- S04E23 The Engagement Reaction

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Wow, so that means you're a doctor, you're a doctor, you're a doctor, you're a doctor, and Howard, you know a lot of doctors.
-- S04E24 The Roommate Transmogrification

Sheldon Cooper: I must say, Amy, I was very impressed to see that Bernadette got her PhD.
Amy Fowler: It's indeed admirable. Although, it is microbiology.
Sheldon Cooper: Your doctorate is in neurobiology. I fail to see the distinction.
Amy Fowler: I'll make it simple for you. I study the brain, the organ responsible for Beethoven's Fifth Symphony. Bernadette studies yeast, the organism responsible for Michelob Lite.
-- S04E24 The Roommate Transmogrification

Leonard Hofstadter: Do you really think you should be eating that cake?
Howard Wolowitz: Why?
Leonard Hofstadter: If you're gonna be a trophy husband for a rich wife, you might want to watch your waistline.
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: He's right. A minute on the lips, a lifetime on the hips.
-- S04E24 The Roommate Transmogrification

Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: Sheldon, dinner!
Sheldon Cooper: What is this?
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: This is the difference between eating and dining.
Sheldon Cooper: Remarkable. I'm just realizing how much Leonard's been skating by all these years.
-- S04E24 The Roommate Transmogrification

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: I listen. I have no idea what it means, but I listen.
-- S04E24 The Roommate Transmogrification

Leonard Hofstadter: What's going on?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh. It's, it's not what it looks like.
Sheldon Cooper: What does it look like?
-- S04E24 The Roommate Transmogrification

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