18 May 2013

The Big Bang Theory (Season 06) Quotes

Title: The Big Bang Theory

Season 06

Amy Fowler: Sheldon, you either say something meaningful and from the heart, or you and I are done.
Sheldon Cooper: Alright. Please... Amy, when I look in your eyes and you're looking back in mine, everything feels not quite normal because I feel stronger and weaker at the same time. I feel excited and, at the same time, terrified. The truth is, I don't know what I feel, except... I know what kind of man I want to be.
Amy Fowler: Sheldon, that was beautiful.
Sheldon Cooper: I should hope so. That's from the first Spider-Man movie.
-- S06E01 The Date Night Variable

Sheldon Cooper: I'm a big fan of homeostasis. Do you know what that is?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Of course not.
Sheldon Cooper: Homeostasis refers to a system's ability to regulate its internal environment and maintain a constant condition of properties like temperature or pH.
Penelope ?, also known as : Worst bedtime story ever.
Sheldon Cooper: My point is I don't like when things change. So, regardless of your feelings, I would like you to continue dating Leonard...
-- S06E02 The Decoupling Fluctuation

Sheldon Cooper: Leonard? Maybe you'd like to go with them to meet girls.
Leonard Hofstadter: Why would I be interested? I have Penny.
Sheldon Cooper: Yeah, for now. But that woman has a death wish, Leonard. She talks to strangers, she pets unfamiliar dogs, and it is ridiculously easy to break into her apartment. If I were you, I'd get a back-up.
-- S06E05 The Holographic Excitation

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: It's from Leonard. He wants to go costume shopping later.
Amy Fowler: I thought you liked Halloween.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: I do. It's just that he wants to go to that party at the comic book store. A lot of the guys that hang out there are kinda creepy.
Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: Like my husband?
Amy Fowler: And my boyfriend?
-- S06E05 The Holographic Excitation

Sheldon Cooper: We seem to have different approaches here. I was going for helpful honesty. I have no idea what you're doing.
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: It's called being nice.
-- S06E05 The Holographic Excitation

Leonard Hofstadter: Is it possible we're having two different conversations?
Sheldon Cooper: How would I know? I'm not listening to you.
-- S06E06 The Extract Obliteration

Sheldon Cooper: Very often when women think they're angry, they're really just hungry.
-- S06E07 The Habitation Configuration

Amy Fowler: Your friend insulted me, and you didn't do anything.
Sheldon Cooper: Precisely, I didn't do anything. Now, does someone feel like checking her emotional math?
-- S06E07 The Habitation Configuration

Leonard Hofstadter: Hey, Alex, let me ask you something. My girlfriend knows this guy at school. He's got an English accent.
Alex Jensen: Oh, I love English accents.
Leonard Hofstadter: Yeah, you all do. Anyway, I feel like he's hitting on her. She says he's just being nice, and that I should trust her.
Alex Jensen: It's probably harmless. You know how it is. I'm sure you get hit on all the time.
Leonard Hofstadter: Right. Because girls are always like, "Oh, that guy owns two Star Trek uniforms, and gets a lot of ear infections. I got to get me some of that."
Alex Jensen: I don't know, I bet it happens more than you realize.
Leonard Hofstadter: Trust me, it doesn't.
Alex Jensen: You sure? You're cute. You’re funny. Maybe you're getting hit on, and you don't even know it.
Leonard Hofstadter: Really?
Alex Jensen: Yep, pretty sure.
-- S06E08 The 43 Peculiarity

Sheldon Cooper: You may not realize it, but I have difficulty navigating certain aspects of daily life. You know, understanding sarcasm, feigning interest in others, not talking about trains as much as I want to. It's exhausting. Which is why, for twenty minutes a day, I like to go down to that room, turn my mind off and do what I need to do to recharge.
Howard Wolowitz: But what are you doing in there?
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: And what does 43 mean?
Sheldon Cooper: You don't need to know, you don't deserve to know, and you will never know.
-- S06E08 The 43 Peculiarity

Sheldon Cooper: Leonard, you're my best friend. Why don't you ever take my side?
Leonard Hofstadter: Because I can never understand your side.
-- S06E09 The Parking Spot Escalation

Leonard Hofstadter: Oh, before I forget, Saturday I'm planning a little Dungeons and Dragons night with the guys.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Really? That's how you're gonna spend your Saturday night?
Leonard Hofstadter: Oh, come on, I hardly ever get a chance to play anymore.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, you poor thing. Is having a real-life girlfriend who has sex with you getting in the way of your board games?
Leonard Hofstadter: Little bit, yeah.
-- S06E11 The Santa Simulation

Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: Damn it.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: What?
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: Now that I know she doesn't like me, I'm kind of into her.
-- S06E11 The Santa Simulation

Sheldon Cooper: It's a comic book convention. You know, it's like pizza or particle accelerators, even the stinky one's still pretty good.
-- S06E13 The Bakersfield Expedition

Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: Excuse me, everybody, can I have your attention please? We're all here tonight because we have no one to be with, but this doesn't make us mutants. The only mutants here are in these comic books. We got to stop defining our self-worth by whether or not we're in a relationship. You know what I see when I look around? I see a room full of great people. So let's give ourselves a break. We are a community and as long as we have each other, we're never truly alone.
-- S06E16 The Tangible Affection Proof

Sheldon Cooper: Amy pointed out to me that since you did something nice for me, I'm obligated to do something nice for you. So, yes, I'll go to your dopey play.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Hey, I don't want you to go any more.
Sheldon Cooper: Why not?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: You should go because you want to go, not because you have to.
Sheldon Cooper: Oh, Dear Lord, more rules? Where does it stop? Can I want to go because I have to want to go?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Okay. Do whatever you want.
Sheldon Cooper: Yeah, but now, wait. Do whatever I want? Or whatever I have to want?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh, for God's sake, just come to the play.
Sheldon Cooper: All right. I don't want to, but at least that makes sense.
-- S06E17 The Monster Isolation

Sheldon Cooper: You know, I haven't seen Raj in several days. Is he no longer a part of our social group? And if so, should we be interviewing for a replacement? Perhaps, this time, we go Latin.
-- S06E17 The Monster Isolation

Sheldon Cooper: If you ask me, this whole thing is a waste of our time.
Leonard Hofstadter: Helping women? Why?
Sheldon Cooper: Helping anyone. People should take care of themselves.
Leonard Hofstadter: Oh, like yesterday, when you made me drive you to the dry cleaners, the pharmacy and the post office?
Sheldon Cooper: I'm not saying people can't use tools. Even an otter picks up a rock when he wants a clam.
-- S06E18 The Contractual Obligation Implementation

Leonard Hofstadter: Guys, please don't make this a school project where I'm the smart kid doing all the work while the slackers sit back and watch.
Sheldon Cooper: We're not. This time you're the smart kid doing all the work while the even smarter kids sit back and watch.
-- S06E18 The Contractual Obligation Implementation

Amy Fowler: His quirks just make you love him more. Someone please agree with me.
-- S06E19 The Closet Reconfiguration

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Come on. Look, the letter was found in Bernadette's closet. Doesn't that count for something?
Sheldon Cooper: Are you pointing out that California is a community property state, and since Howard and Bernadette are married, the intellectual property contained in that letter is jointly owned by the two spouses?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Yeah, obviously.
Sheldon Cooper: Well played. Sometimes I don't give you enough credit, Penny.
-- S06E19 The Closet Reconfiguration

Sheldon Cooper: You know, surprisingly, the letter from your father wasn't the most interesting thing I read in the closet. Bernadette's diary has some saucy passages.
Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: Sheldon, don't you dare.
Sheldon Cooper: There's nothing to worry about. Your secret's safe with me.
Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: That's more like it.
Sheldon Cooper: Although copyright law would allow me to quote snippets in the context of a review.
-- S06E19 The Closet Reconfiguration

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: So who do you have to smooze to get this deal?
Leonard Hofstadter: I'm not going to smooze anyone. I'm going to let my work speak for itself.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: That's great, that takes a lot of integrity.
Leonard Hofstadter: I'm a naive idiot, right?
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Oh good, you heard me.
-- S06E20 The Tenure Turbulence

Sheldon Cooper: What do you think I should do?
Amy Fowler: Well, you'll always be an academic success, but I seriously question whether you'll make any more friends.
Sheldon Cooper: I don't want any more, but let's go.
-- S06E20 The Tenure Turbulence

Amy Fowler: Okay. Well, what I think is going on here is you have a pathological need for closure.
Sheldon Cooper: Oh, that's nonsense. I mean, you tell me stories about your day all the time. I don't care how they end.
Amy Fowler: You know, I might be able to help you with this. There's a whole field of behavioral neuroscience that examines ways to retrain your neural pathways so stuff like this bothers you less.
Sheldon Cooper: Yeah, but I just told you, I don't have a problem with closure.
Amy Fowler: You sure about that?
Sheldon Cooper: Oh, quite sure... That proves nothing.
-- S06E21 The Closure Alternative

Amy Fowler: I've come up with a series of exercises to help with your compulsive need for closure.
Sheldon Cooper: I take issue with the word compulsive.
Amy Fowler: All I'm saying is, we live in a world where closure isn't always an op...
Sheldon Cooper: ...tion. Okay. For the sake of argument, let's say I have a problem. What would be your plan for addressing it?
Amy Fowler: I'm going to recondition your brain so that the need for completion isn't so overwhelming.
-- S06E21 The Closure Alternative

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: See? I wish I had some of that fire in my life. I mean, I want to care about things and get excited like you guys.
Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: Well, there's no reason you can't.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: You think?
Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: Absolutely. All we need to do is spend a little time and find something you're passionate about.
Penelope ?, also known as Penny: Ugh, that sounds like a lot of work.
-- S06E21 The Closure Alternative

Lucy ?: Is something going on?
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: What do you mean?
Lucy ?: Well, you're acting all weird, and I'm pretty weird, so I think I know what I'm talking about.
-- S06E21 The Closure Alternative

Arthur Jeffries, also known as Professor Proton: Is, uh, is he dangerous?
Leonard Hofstadter: Actually, he's a genius.
Sheldon Cooper: I am.
Arthur Jeffries, also known as Professor Proton: That doesn't answer my question.
-- S06E22 The Proton Resurgence

Arthur Jeffries, also known as Professor Proton: Is the, is the blonde girl really your, your girlfriend?
Leonard Hofstadter: Yes, sir.
Arthur Jeffries, also known as Professor Proton: You're the genius.
-- S06E22 The Proton Resurgence

Penelope ?, also known as Penny: So, do you do a lot of appearances like this?
Arthur Jeffries, also known as Professor Proton: It, it's hard to say. I'm, I'm still trying to figure out what, what, what this is.
-- S06E22 The Proton Resurgence

Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: Hang on, you've had her for hours?
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: Yes. I picked her up, and then we both went for massages to try and calm down, and then we got Pinkberry.
Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: So you knew she was okay, and you couldn't pick up the phone to tell us?
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: Well, I, I thought about...
Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: Don't well me, mister. We've been worried sick. She could have been dead for all we knew. You should be ashamed of yourself.
Rajesh Koothrappali, also known as Raj: Sorry. I, I just...
Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: Sorry's not good enough. Maybe you need to take some time and think about what you've done.
Howard Wolowitz: Nice guilt trip. You are gonna be an amazing mom.
-- S06E22 The Proton Resurgence